Purple pants!

My boss was so excited about this find that he had to make it into a display. The shirt pockets look like eyes.

New motto

I know some people that could benefit from this!

Creepiest doll ever!

Aaaaaaagghhhhhhh!

It has 3 faces!! Sleeping, crying and happy. The hair is stationary while the faces spin and spin into insanity.

Holographic Jesus

I just don't understand why.

Regular Jesus is welcome, drug-induced Jesus can knock somewhere else. Thanks!

 

Protection

I work in an interesting place. I was wearing this just in case...

Wiggy

I felt beautiful until a child told me I looked like a grandma. Then she tried it on and giggled.

Mmm candy

Used candy at a thrift store is disturbing but this takes it to a whole new level.

True story

I love funny t- shirts. This one is gold.

Happy St. Patrick's day

This customer donated his dignity long ago. Leprechaun Lee is entertaining and he has a heart of gold.

Team spirit?

I think it looks like a tooth. Is it supposed to be a horse butt? It was donated with a lot of Broncos memorabilia.

Lizard

This little cutie was donated with a couch. He was so calm and easy to catch. It made me worried that he was sick. When I put him in the rocks though he zipped off.

Ladybugs!

I love the iridescent color and the crazy eyes. 

Girdle

I love my models. They are such good sports.

Leprosy doll

I just feel all sorts of bad for this doll. Missing nose, sunken face, cheeks look like he has a fever, target painted on his shield AND gray hair. There is also something wrong with his feet.

Chemo doll

Her hair was disintegrating....

I just want to shout out to all the survivors out there that went through hell and came out the other side. At the same time my heart breaks for the ones that have been devastated by cancer. I hope my joke wasn't offensive. <3

Mug shot

Free lipstick spot with purchase.

Geek plates

I kind of hate collectable plates but not these ones!

Used soap bar

I know we recycle gently used items but there is a line you shouldn't cross when donating. Used toiletries are really far past that line of demarcation.

A little tipsy

I conveniently found the book to go with this leggy donation. I showed the wine cork to a customer and he said that was why he didn't drink anymore. I said, Because you kept falling into the bottle during drunken ballet? He nodded seriously. Well, that is how it would have happened if Hollywood had written the script. I made up the rest of the story after the word "bottle".

I heart t-shirt sayings

So this nice guy is moving and donated some stuff. This shirt is an example of his awesome level. 

Beware of frog

He has an animal tail sticking out of his mouth. Cat or fluffy dog would be my guess.

Missing missile

I wonder if they ever found it. 

Not a crime

All the good stuff is printed on drink insulators.

Nipple covers

This is one of my volunteers modeling this donation. :)

Tooth

So I thought this was so gross that I took a picture and then threw it away. I found out later it could be valuable. If it is an elk tooth, it could be ivory and they make jewelry out of them. They only have 2 teeth that are ivory. Some scientists believe they are remnants of saber-like tusks that their elk ancestors had and used in combat. All that would have been awesome to know before I threw it away. It still had tooth gristle stuff on it!

The secret of Strength

I love this mirror so much. "And find that it greatly aids me in the proper assimilation of food." Such a great line! His outfit is vintage-ly sexy and those horse straps are sturdy! Also, there is a hotty in the mirror!

Bag of disappointment

This is NOT a keyboard. It is a bag of wet paper towels and a stinky meat-like substance. 

Hats again!

Optimus Prime hat. This hat made transformers transforming sounds. 

 

Stormtrooper hat. He had a weird accent.

 

Mmm bacon.

 

 

I was wearing this hat and trying to take a picture when someone came in the back to talk to me. I took the picture then removed the hat and told him that now he could talk to me and take me more seriously. He laughed anyway.

 

Valentines gift

I have the best customers. A very sweet person gave me jeweler glasses and a bottle of nitric acid for Valentine's day. I am so lucky! 

Post-superbowl letdown

This was donated the day after the super bowl and I thought it was hilarious.